This outstanding article by guest writer Drew B. was originally posted on another blog in December 2019, where it generated thousands of views and abundant feedback. It even prompted the interest of podcast Team Phoenix, where an abridged version of the article was read aloud by host Chris W., with a follow-up live episode in which author Drew B. made an appearance to discuss the Chris Watts case. As the article offers a critical perspective of Nichol Kessinger's connection to the Watts crime, True Crime, True Life™ blog is proud to feature such a resource to the study of this case.
"Loathing Nichol"
Part 1.
By Drew B.
"There is perhaps no phenomenon which contains so much destructive feeling as 'moral indignation,' which permits envy or hate to be acted out under the guise of virtue."
--Erich Fromm: Man For Himself: An Inquiry into the Psychology of Ethics.
"Hypocrisy is the homage vice pays to virtue."
--Francois de La Rochefoucauld
"Show me there's a reason for your wanting me to die, You're far to keen and where and how, but not so hot on why."
--Andrew Lloyd Weber and Tim Rice: Gethsemane
While somewhat late to a detailed study of this case, I have recently spent some time attempting to better understand the tragic and somewhat incomprehensible classification of murder known as familicide. Familicide occurs when a perpetrator (the majority of which are men) murders multiple family members. Familicide is generally premeditated and often concludes when the perpetrator commits suicide. Today, familicide is better understood but there is still a great deal about these rare cases that leave researchers with two questions for every answer. There is no doubt that these cases are as complicated as they are destructive.
In the early morning hours of August 13, 2018, Christopher Watts committed familicide when he murdered his wife Sha'nann (34) and fifteen weeks pregnant, and daughters Bella (4) and Celeste (3). Later that morning he disposed of their bodies at his petroleum industry field worksite. Missed almost immediately by close friends and business associates due to Sha'nann's ever-present social media activity, as well as a missed appointment with a physician, Watts initially claimed that Sha'nann and his daughters were out on a play date with friends.
From his first contact with law enforcement (who were called to conduct a welfare check at the Wattses Frederick, CO home) his peculiar and dispassionate behavior made him an immediate suspect. That Sha'nann left behind her vehicle (with car seats) her purse, cell phone, medications etc..., did nothing but add to a rapidly growing suspicion that Chris Watts had done something truly awful. He settled on a strategy of playing dumb and oblivious.
His story was a nightmare of speculative improbabilities and a poorly executed strategy of narrative misdirection and obfuscation. Watts, though tragically lethal, was also shockingly inept. As the investigation surrounding the whereabouts of his missing family intensified, scrutiny of his implausible story and general insouciance began to dictate the tone of the investigation. After several unconvincing media interviews, lengthy questioning by local, state and federal authorities (including both the Colorado Bureau of Investigation [CBI] and the FBI) Watts agreed to sit for a polygraph examination. He was informed by authorities that he'd not only failed but that he was perhaps one of the worst liars in the history of polygraphs. Whether his results were reported accurately (or he was bluffed) he quickly began to unravel.
Watts has told several versions of the murders and what occurred (including a staggeringly idiotic version in which he claimed to have killed Sha'nann in a reflexive rage response to Sha'nann killing their young daughters) but eventually Watts confessed to murdering his family. As part of his confession and plea deal with the Weld County Colorado D.A., Sha'nann's own family asked that the prosecution set aside the possibility of Watts receiving the death penalty. Watts will spend the rest of his life in prison.
During the initial investigation of his then missing family, authorities discovered that Watts had been involved in a two month affair with a thirty-one year old female co-worker. Her name is Nichol Kessinger. She might be the most hated woman in America. Rooted in a bitter mixture of karmic permissibility and a refillable script of selective indignation, loathing Nichol has become a morbid form of sport. And it's become a problem.
While Nichol was in fact involved in a romantic affair with Chris Watts, and while her initial reaction to realizing that Chris Watts had likely wiped out his entire family, Kessinger did attempt to both hide the affair and clean up electronic links to the affair. It didn't look particularly good, but it was absolutely understandable. It was self-preservation and it was unapologetically efficient. It raises some questions but it doesn't come close to revealing a co-conspirator. As such, authorities have not charged Nichol Kessinger with a single crime related to the murders of Sha'nann, Bella, and Celeste. Not a single criminal charge. Prior to the confession that led to his being sentenced, Watts never came close to suggesting that anyone else was involved in the planning, commission, or concealment of his murders.
One of the most fascinating, and sadly overlooked aspects of Nichol Kessinger's proximity to such a horrible crime is less about who she is a person and more about what she came to represent to the case in relation to the victims and the motivation of their husband/father murderer. In a number of comments and opinions (found in various social media posts/video comment sections) discussing Kessinger and the case, people tend to avoid trying to understand Kessinger the person. I'm not surprised. The totality of her life has been edited down to a moment of her life. This moment of her life strikes at the very core of what those who hate her most, need most from her. To justify their understandable moral outrage directed at Watts, some have felt compelled to bolster their social media witch-hunting cred by insisting that Kessinger, even if not directly involved, is no less guilty than Watts himself. In their need to understand the why of such a terrible crime, they need the fuse, and the match that provided the spark. They need Kessinger to be a shallow and reprehensible family-jacking whore with no morals and no integrity. Once she is all of those things, it requires just a small step forward to call her a murderer. And even if the latter is never proven criminally, they draw comfort from a moral failure conviction for the former.
Thinking of her as a flawed human being who willingly got involved in an affair with a then married man (who spent a great deal of his time convincing her that his marriage was fractured and damaged beyond repair) humanizes her. Those who advocate for her being "convicted," are always more sure of the need for a desired outcome than they are about legal requirements and due process. The idea that a man capable of murdering his wife and young children might also be capable of manipulating a female colleague into believing that his marriage was over, is completely lost on them. That Kessinger was naive, impetuous, and far too romantically optimistic is, without a doubt, a fair charge. I very much doubt that she would attempt a defense of such a statement. But even if true in a manner that reveals character traits conducive to situationally suspect moral fiber, it's miles away from legal or moral responsibility for the obliteration of a family.
Those who hate Nichol Kessinger for participating in an affair cannot separate the affair from the murders. This is usually sidestepped in a blizzard of nonsensical word salad that nearly always fails to admit that what they really want simply isn't feasible. They want to lock away what she represents. She represents fear. The fear of profound personal betrayal (haven't we all had moments of anxiety as it relates to the fragility of marital/relationship fidelity) and doesn't that fear strike at the very things (e.g., esteem, self confidence, self worth, and trust) we attempt to protect most? Once the terrible truth about Watts and the savage murder of his family was flashed to our media saturated lives, "case-canon," was inevitable. Justice for the murdered was rightfully demanded. But what of the other woman? The hatred and suspicion was automatic. Again, what followed was predictable. "She did this. She caused this. SHE has blood on HER hands. She is just as guilty as Chris." That small step taken, presumption of innocence was replaced by an assumption of guilt.
The initial script read:
"Because Kessinger participated in an affair with a married man, who then killed his wife and kids, she too is guilty. She seduced him. He's the monster but she was in the lab cooking up the psychopathy. This is what happens when you target and stalk a beautiful family. She's evil, awful, disgusting (once on a roll, the insult/adjective dam usually fails, flooding the landscape with invective) and that family would probably be alive today if she hadn't forced her way in. She used her body and sexuality to lure him. She wanted what Sha'nann had."
This is basically the blindfolded masses drunkenly and wildly swinging at logical fallacy pinatas.
Not only does this provide a disgusting level of cover to Chris Watts (more on that later) it ignores the deeper questions. If a six-eight week affair caused an otherwise mentally healthy father and husband to annihilate his family, why is this outcome the exception and not the rule? If some hold that Watts killed his family in order to secure a relationship with a "willing," Kessinger, why can't the argument be made that he would have killed them in order to change the mind of an unwilling Kessinger? We know the actual circumstances that led to his decision to kill his family. But we don't know that those were the only circumstances that would have resulted in similar actions with a modified reason. His cowardice compelled him to identify a reason. That doesn't mean he wasn't pathetic enough to make those reasons malleable.
The narrative set, many thought it would only be a matter of weeks before Kessinger would be arrested and tried as an accomplice. But it didn't happen. Unwilling to even entertain the idea that authorities simply found no evidence that warranted criminal charges, newly created YouTube channels offered the 120-minute criminology degree with a minor in identifying each of the 2,327 distinct facial twitches that "prove," guilt. Home security cameras and pixelated images of red cars. Cell tower pings, (analysis then provided by people who don't understand cell phone tower pings) deleted texts, pawn shop rings, and Kessinger's Google searches would finally produce the anticipated mugshots. Still, it didn't happen. It still hasn't. It probably won't. The narrative was dead. Hate with a karma chaser has replaced evidence and truth.
One of the many problems with viewing Kessinger in this light is that it leads to believing that we can right a moral failure with a judicial solution. Hubris then leads some to believe that it's their duty to collect on that moral debt. I have read thousands of comments that prove this very point. A comment I read a few months ago said: "Even if she didn't actually participate in the murders, she caused them. She should be sent to prison for life." Another measured and not at all hysterical comment read: "I don't even care what they arrest her for, as long as she's convicted."
Really? Anyone else see how a judicial system regulated by karma and moral indignation might be a massive shit show? On the fringes of Kessinger haters there are people who wouldn't lose a moment of sleep if Kessinger was hauled to Salem, Massachusetts and tried for being a witch. And even if most would argue against it going quite that far, a number of people are absolutely fine with her social isolation and hiding. For others, her personal shame is actually a source of happiness. Talk about low standards. That their personal glee in the isolation of a person who hasn't been accused, tried, or convicted of a single crime, says something more profound about them than it does about Kessinger is lost on them.
Some argue that one of Kessinger's biggest failures is that she hasn't "proven," that she is innocent of involvement in the murders. Those people argue that she should "have," to take a polygraph. Sometimes they go on to argue that she should apologize for the affair. Arguments like these are the result of people becoming obsessed and manic in their belief that Kessinger owes anyone anything or that anything she did would change a single made up mind. Our legal system requires the state prove a defendant guilty, not that a person (who hasn't even been charged) prove their innocence. And even if she tried, it would be a disaster. If Kessinger wrote a thousand letters of apology and passed twenty polygraph tests, the very people who demanded she do so wouldn't be moved in the least.
*No polygraph: "She's guilty and afraid to submit to a polygraph. She'd be caught lying."
*Multiple passed polygraph tests: "See, she's so sociopathic, she learned how to beat them. She's even more evil than we thought."
An odd phenomenon is now active as it relates to Kessinger, Chris Watts, and Sha'nann Watts. So much of the visceral hatred of Kessinger has given fuel and cover for a coward in a Wisconsin maximum security prison to once again look for a woman to blame for his actions. Those who continue to put even a portion of his crimes on his mistress, are reducing his culpability. I imagine that he enjoys that. First, he blamed Sha'nann for killing his daughters and now some are allowing him to blame Kessinger. Congratulations. Way to give him a small measure of peace. As long as people refuse to hold him accountable for every aspect of his crimes, he feels less culpable. Kessinger has been investigated by multiple law enforcement agencies and not a single charge has been filed. If that changes, I will see what the state has and what a jury finds. But until then, she is guilty of having participated in an affair with a garbage human who murdered his family. The affair was his responsibility to stop. He was married. He had taken marriage vows. He was responsible. Every single time I read a comment about how Kessinger seduced him and was basically a force of nature that Watts couldn't resist, I feel the onset of a crushing headache. That line of reasoning plays right into his hands. Because if Kessinger really was something so strong that he against his will he was pulled into an affair, then just wait for him to argue that Sha'nann being a Type-A personality that made him feel unappreciated and small, played a part in his killing her. If he is allowed to be super weak when it comes to Kessinger, he'll argue the same as it relates to Sha'nann.
I can hold that I don't like what Kessinger did (the affair) and still hold that her participation in the affair isn't the unforgivable sin. Millions of people have committed adultery. It's not a great look and it harms people and relationships. But it isn't comparable to murdering a wife and mother.
Those who continue to wish all manner of misery and plague to befall Ms. Kessinger are free to harbor such wishes and thoughts. But their doing so doesn't honor the memories of a murdered mother and her children. It's the felexive slashing at the curtain that hides behind it a simple truth. Chris Watts murdered his family because he wasn't enough of a man to address and deal with the problems that for years, had consumed his life. He wouldn't confront and he wouldn't fight to make better a marriage that was badly broken by lack of communication, uncontrolled debt, hubris, poor health, and structure. In Nichol Kessinger he found escape. In Chris Watts, Kessinger thought she had found a chance at her own version of happiness. That she was among the many people in his life that couldn't see the rage and resentment grow to the point of a final terrible fracture, doesn't make her responsible for all of the micro-fractures that he had become practiced at concealing.
He is responsible. He alone is responsible. Absent a needle, an easy to hit vein, and a cocktail of drugs that would've paralyzed his diaphragm and stopped his heart, he's where he should be. He doesn't deserve compassion manufactured by his residual manipulation, and Nichol Kessinger doesn't deserve a life sentence of bitterness and blame for a crime she did not commit. I'll defend that stance in the second and final part of this article.
(End, Part 1)
